I feel like I have lived,
but I am not in love with life,
I feel tired, fatigued,
I feel I have had a measure and am ready to drift on,
but am stranded here instead searching,
unfinished business, to dwell upon.
I have reached out
into the void, but have not connected,
..conjoined ..melded, ..or even understood as I wish,
this oblivion that surrounds me,
I am not one as yet,
as it is, that I desire to be.
…I am beginning
to think it will only come with death,
the quietening of these longings (that beset),
maybe then they will move to be silent,
maybe then they will allow me to travel on,
…to where it is
…my soul belongs.